buttering someone up
Meaning
To flatter or praise someone excessively and insincerely, usually to gain their favor or something from them.
Origin
Imagine ancient religious rituals where offerings of rich, creamy butter were made to deities, hoping to gain their favor or appease their anger. This practice of "smoothing over" the gods with something precious and delightful eventually seeped into common parlance, evolving into the phrase "buttering someone up." By the 19th century, this wasn't about divine intervention anymore, but about human manipulation. It became a vivid way to describe someone lavishly complimenting or flattering another person, not out of pure admiration, but with a clear aim: to make them feel so pleased and agreeable that they couldn't refuse a request. The image of literally smearing someone with something rich and pleasant, making them soft and pliable, perfectly captures the essence of this often self-serving act.
Examples
- She was clearly buttering her boss up before asking for that significant raise.
- My younger brother is always buttering Mom up right before he needs to borrow money.